I am roots in the ground.
I am a pillar in the foundation.
I am a brick in the mortar and
I cannot be moved.
I am strength to hope and hope to fight
I am will to risk and risk to try
I am resilience and
I cannot be moved
Not by anything
Not by wind, not by wake,
Not by trials will I break.
Not by crowds, not by friends,
Not by failures will I bend
I am faith and
I cannot be moved
I will press against the tide
I will stand against the wind
I will push against the current
I will grow against the storm
I am courage and
I cannot be moved
If the odds are against me
I would push forward and conquer
If there is no one beside me
I would refuse to give up
If my past says I can’t and my present is impossible
I will yet believe and not doubt
I am established and
I cannot be moved
Yes I am established in One who is greater
One and only One
And by Him and through Him and in Him alone
I have meaning and purpose and reason to live
And by his grace
I am saved and
I cannot be moved
~ K.G. Miller
21.10.10
23.9.10
Never Expected to Start Like This
I have a very odd demographic for my youth group. It adds quite an interesting flare to my first year of full time ministry here in Lethbridge. Let me break it down for you:
My youth group is whack. Ok, no, not my youth exactly (although I’m sure even they would admit to certain moments of ‘whackness’), but more so what I have to work with in terms of the nature of the youth group and my leaders. Let’s start with the boy/girl split. A normal group of kids in a youth group would be slightly male dominated. Where I am, we are heavily female dominated. 80-90% of the group is made up of females on any given night. WOW. That’s all I can really say about that. I’m sure you can only imagine what that must be like for me on a Friday night. But, oh, it gets much better. Not only is the group made up of mostly females, but the large majority of the group is Jr. High, super hyper –active females. Pure energy all the time. I do admit, for the most part, this is awesome. I love the energy these girls bring to youth. It’s contagious for everyone. But, too much of anything is never a good thing... that’s where my youth leaders come into play to help.
Thankfully, yet oddly enough, I have a female dominated youth team. In fact, I only have one guy leader and the rest are girls. This is a much needed balance to the nature of the youth group we have at the moment. I think the best part of this is that my leaders are all so quality. It is so wonderful for the youth to have someone that’s been through their own same stuff to look up to. Having these quality female leaders to be there for all the girls that show up to youth is such a blessing, both for the girls and for me.
There is one more odd component of youth this year. I am particular in using the word “odd” as not to elude to some negative nature in this component, because honestly and truly it is a blessing. I have a huge youth leadership team for the size of youth I have. In fact, I have more youth leaders than I have youth on some nights. I’ve had to start turning leaders away, which I absolutely hate to do. I have to admit, I am quite confused why God would provide more leaders than youth. Maybe he is helping me prepare for growth. Maybe he is giving me a unique opportunity to bring depth. Maybe I will never fully know why.
One thing I am sure of is this: when God wants to accomplish something, he will always provide the means to do so. If you only get one thing from this post, get that.
My youth group is whack. Ok, no, not my youth exactly (although I’m sure even they would admit to certain moments of ‘whackness’), but more so what I have to work with in terms of the nature of the youth group and my leaders. Let’s start with the boy/girl split. A normal group of kids in a youth group would be slightly male dominated. Where I am, we are heavily female dominated. 80-90% of the group is made up of females on any given night. WOW. That’s all I can really say about that. I’m sure you can only imagine what that must be like for me on a Friday night. But, oh, it gets much better. Not only is the group made up of mostly females, but the large majority of the group is Jr. High, super hyper –active females. Pure energy all the time. I do admit, for the most part, this is awesome. I love the energy these girls bring to youth. It’s contagious for everyone. But, too much of anything is never a good thing... that’s where my youth leaders come into play to help.
Thankfully, yet oddly enough, I have a female dominated youth team. In fact, I only have one guy leader and the rest are girls. This is a much needed balance to the nature of the youth group we have at the moment. I think the best part of this is that my leaders are all so quality. It is so wonderful for the youth to have someone that’s been through their own same stuff to look up to. Having these quality female leaders to be there for all the girls that show up to youth is such a blessing, both for the girls and for me.
There is one more odd component of youth this year. I am particular in using the word “odd” as not to elude to some negative nature in this component, because honestly and truly it is a blessing. I have a huge youth leadership team for the size of youth I have. In fact, I have more youth leaders than I have youth on some nights. I’ve had to start turning leaders away, which I absolutely hate to do. I have to admit, I am quite confused why God would provide more leaders than youth. Maybe he is helping me prepare for growth. Maybe he is giving me a unique opportunity to bring depth. Maybe I will never fully know why.
One thing I am sure of is this: when God wants to accomplish something, he will always provide the means to do so. If you only get one thing from this post, get that.
15.8.10
Who’s the one confusing it?
This is a response to the last post that Joel put on here. Right off the bat I want to say, I couldn’t agree more with you, Joel. These have been my exact thoughts lately. I have been thinking and praying about where the ministry should go here, and every time I do God brings me back to the conviction that everything we do must focus explicitly and intentionally on him. Of course, to someone reading this, even someone like myself as a recent graduate of Bible College, this sounds pain-stakingly obvious. Why else would a ministry be run in a church except to focus on God? For that matter, why else would we as Christians do anything except to focus on God? You know what, that’s actually not a bad question. Unfortunately, however, it’s not always that easy.
Here in my first few weeks of trying to relaunch this ministry, I have to confess that the majority of my energy has been spent on trying to figure out budgets and programming. Let me tell you, it’s very easy to begin thinking that these things, the numbers and systems of running an organization, are the reason the ministry exists. More than that, we become so easily blinded by the unknown of the future that we think somehow the right numbers and systems will provide us security. Have you ever been there?
It becomes even more confusing when we begin to see there are certain things we do or have that may not actually be bringing us closer to God. Perhaps some of these things may be bringing us further away from God and purpose for existing. But these things are so hard to let go of because they are attractive to us, and likely attractive to others. Take the hyped up games at youth for example; not to say at all there is no place for these, but what happens when we start relying on these to increase the numbers of our ministry? What happens when these things become the focus of why we exist? What happens when the people in our ministry come primarily because of entertainment and socialization? Even more, what happens when those in our ministry leave as soon as we teach them how to grow closer to Christ?
And so, while the question may be simple, the answer is not always as obvious. The answer may even be confusing. The question, then, is why. Why is the answer so confusing to us? In looking for the answer, perhaps it has much less to do with the answer, but the one trying to answer. I think as humans we have this habit of trying to find every solution outside of ourselves. It never has anything to do with us because, I mean, after all we have it all together. How could we possibly be part of the problem? It must be someone or something else, right?
If we took some needed time and breathed deep of humility and correction I think we may find the confusion lies in our need to justify the comforts and securities around us. We don’t like the idea of running a ministry that will hold people to character and conviction. We would rather hold to the things that we are familiar with and can somewhat seemingly control: numbers and systems. We would rather keep things comfortable in the name of being “seeker friendly”. We would rather suggest morality than warn of the eternal consequences of sin and lovingly restore a sinner. We would rather keep our doors open, hoping that somehow, somewhere a lost soul will come to us looking for answers than go out into the world with urgency to tell the world that purpose has been found in the Son of God who paid our penalty on the cross and rose from the grave to conquer death once and for all.
Who’s the one confusing?
You see, when we try to justify, things become confusing. When we focus more on compromise than conviction, our perspective becomes blurred even to the point that we firmly believe what we are doing is good even if it is not bringing us closer to God. However, something different happens when we hold on to our conviction in Christ. In Christ, there is no confusion. For those who are in Christ, there is no confusion because by the Holy Spirit they have the mind of Christ (cf. Rom 8:1-15). Therefore, in Christ there is no confusion. There may, however, very likely be difficulty and pain, but when it comes to right and wrong, there will not be confusion. If you find yourself asking of your ministry, “I wonder if this is honouring to God,” you have a much more serious issue than trying to figure out what events to run.
So forget your events, forget your numbers, forget vision planning. Do you have a passion for Christ? Do you desire with every piece of your being to know, love, serve and proclaim Jesus at every moment? Is it your inmost purpose to bring others closer to God?
How much clearer things would be if we focussed on Christ!
Dispel the confusion, hold on to conviction.
Here in my first few weeks of trying to relaunch this ministry, I have to confess that the majority of my energy has been spent on trying to figure out budgets and programming. Let me tell you, it’s very easy to begin thinking that these things, the numbers and systems of running an organization, are the reason the ministry exists. More than that, we become so easily blinded by the unknown of the future that we think somehow the right numbers and systems will provide us security. Have you ever been there?
It becomes even more confusing when we begin to see there are certain things we do or have that may not actually be bringing us closer to God. Perhaps some of these things may be bringing us further away from God and purpose for existing. But these things are so hard to let go of because they are attractive to us, and likely attractive to others. Take the hyped up games at youth for example; not to say at all there is no place for these, but what happens when we start relying on these to increase the numbers of our ministry? What happens when these things become the focus of why we exist? What happens when the people in our ministry come primarily because of entertainment and socialization? Even more, what happens when those in our ministry leave as soon as we teach them how to grow closer to Christ?
And so, while the question may be simple, the answer is not always as obvious. The answer may even be confusing. The question, then, is why. Why is the answer so confusing to us? In looking for the answer, perhaps it has much less to do with the answer, but the one trying to answer. I think as humans we have this habit of trying to find every solution outside of ourselves. It never has anything to do with us because, I mean, after all we have it all together. How could we possibly be part of the problem? It must be someone or something else, right?
If we took some needed time and breathed deep of humility and correction I think we may find the confusion lies in our need to justify the comforts and securities around us. We don’t like the idea of running a ministry that will hold people to character and conviction. We would rather hold to the things that we are familiar with and can somewhat seemingly control: numbers and systems. We would rather keep things comfortable in the name of being “seeker friendly”. We would rather suggest morality than warn of the eternal consequences of sin and lovingly restore a sinner. We would rather keep our doors open, hoping that somehow, somewhere a lost soul will come to us looking for answers than go out into the world with urgency to tell the world that purpose has been found in the Son of God who paid our penalty on the cross and rose from the grave to conquer death once and for all.
Who’s the one confusing?
You see, when we try to justify, things become confusing. When we focus more on compromise than conviction, our perspective becomes blurred even to the point that we firmly believe what we are doing is good even if it is not bringing us closer to God. However, something different happens when we hold on to our conviction in Christ. In Christ, there is no confusion. For those who are in Christ, there is no confusion because by the Holy Spirit they have the mind of Christ (cf. Rom 8:1-15). Therefore, in Christ there is no confusion. There may, however, very likely be difficulty and pain, but when it comes to right and wrong, there will not be confusion. If you find yourself asking of your ministry, “I wonder if this is honouring to God,” you have a much more serious issue than trying to figure out what events to run.
So forget your events, forget your numbers, forget vision planning. Do you have a passion for Christ? Do you desire with every piece of your being to know, love, serve and proclaim Jesus at every moment? Is it your inmost purpose to bring others closer to God?
How much clearer things would be if we focussed on Christ!
Dispel the confusion, hold on to conviction.
11.8.10
Re: How Would You Start?
Starting up a ministry is something that isn't easy. It's the question I have been asking myself over the last month and a bit. Where do I start, what are my priorities? At first, my biggest priority was getting to know people. Meet with this person, meet with that person. Chat about this, talk about that. It was a good way for me to get an idea of what is going on here at NAC but also to get to know the people that I will be working with. Also, I started to plan. Get things planned for the year and even start to dream and vision for the next three to five years. Where to we want to be and who do we want to be were the questions I was asking and trying to answer. As much as those things are great and will probably help me in the long run, over the last week I have started to change my thoughts. This is what I read that changed my mind:
"The sacrifice of the wicked is an abomination to the Lord,
But the prayer of the upright is His delight
The way of the wicked is an abomination to the Lord,
But He loves one who pursues righteousness" -proverbs 15.8-9
Looking at it now it seems pretty simple. Pursue righteousness and be upright and God will be happy with you. I think what I got from this is that how I should start up my ministry here is to focus on myself. Make sure I am pursuing righteousness and being someone who is upright. I also need to be praying though. So if there are three things that I am going to put in priority for starting up in full time ministry, these are them: pray, pursue righteousness and be a person who is upright. Easy huh?
"The sacrifice of the wicked is an abomination to the Lord,
But the prayer of the upright is His delight
The way of the wicked is an abomination to the Lord,
But He loves one who pursues righteousness" -proverbs 15.8-9
Looking at it now it seems pretty simple. Pursue righteousness and be upright and God will be happy with you. I think what I got from this is that how I should start up my ministry here is to focus on myself. Make sure I am pursuing righteousness and being someone who is upright. I also need to be praying though. So if there are three things that I am going to put in priority for starting up in full time ministry, these are them: pray, pursue righteousness and be a person who is upright. Easy huh?
9.8.10
How Would You Start
This is my first full week of ministry at UDAC (University Drive Alliance Church) and the question of the week is: how do we launch a new youth and young adult’s ministry? Have you ever thought about that? You don’t need to be a pastor to think about this or try to answer the question for yourself. In fact, I believe it is crucial for the church of God to be thinking through these kind of questions whether you are paid for full time ministry or not. So what would your answer be?
I don’t claim to be any genius on this issue. I actually think I’m quite “green” when it comes to the ins and outs of youth ministry. However, I know at least a little bit about leadership and a bit about the bible, so I think I may know at least where I could start. The questions I believe to be essential to answer in starting a youth ministry are as follows:
Why does the ministry exist?
Why would someone want to be a part of the ministry?
How is this ministry going to make a difference where you are?
These questions are not easy to answer. Take a moment and reflect on the ministries you have. Whether these ministries are in a church or in the community, how would you answer these questions?
I don’t claim to be any genius on this issue. I actually think I’m quite “green” when it comes to the ins and outs of youth ministry. However, I know at least a little bit about leadership and a bit about the bible, so I think I may know at least where I could start. The questions I believe to be essential to answer in starting a youth ministry are as follows:
Why does the ministry exist?
Why would someone want to be a part of the ministry?
How is this ministry going to make a difference where you are?
These questions are not easy to answer. Take a moment and reflect on the ministries you have. Whether these ministries are in a church or in the community, how would you answer these questions?
19.7.10
everything
What does it take to give everything to God? What does it take to give just one thing to God? What does it take to dedicate something to God? When we ask for something, does God it to us for ourselves? Or does he give it to us so that we can turn around and give it right back?
1 Samuel 1:20-28
This is what challenged me today. Hannah showed ultimate faith.
1 Samuel 1:20-28
This is what challenged me today. Hannah showed ultimate faith.
14.7.10
An Urge to Blog
It is quite strange, but I was overcome with an urge to blog about something; and that is the strange part. I just have an urge to write about something, nothing specific. Actually, if I am going to be honest with you, I have absolutely no idea at this point what I am going to write about. Oh, by the way, this is just a little secret for those of you interested in how I come up with what I put in my book: it’s pretty much just like what I am doing right now. I start out writing about absolutely nothing and eventually arrive at something meaningful. This time is slightly different, though. This time I have this leading in my spirit to write, and so I am going to.
Perhaps I am writing for one of you reading this. Perhaps I am writing this so that I can learn something through introspection. I honestly do not know yet. What I do know is that I am writing for a purpose, and this purpose, whatever it should be, was already in the mind of God before I started writing. I know that God has purpose for what I write, because it was him who gave me the ability to write in the first place. He gave me the ability to write and he develops my ability as I put it to use. Certainly, my intention in putting my ability in writing, and all my abilities for that matter, to use is to follow God’s leading and bring glory to his name. There is no use in using any of my abilities unless they are used unto God.
It is quite convicting to look back and assess the amount of time I have spent using my abilities for something other than giving them completely back to God. There are so many times that I simply don’t put the abilities God has gifted me with to good use, let alone the times that I completely profane my gifts whenever I am led away into sin. What God has gifted me with is meant to be entirely and immensely focused on him. God has gifted me with abilities, not so that I could spend them on myself, but so that I could spend them on his kingdom. Yet, there are so many times when I am not even aware of how I am using my gifts for God. There are countless occasions in my experience where using my gifts for God are not even a thought in my mind.
Take for example my trip to the Calgary Stampede on Sunday (ok, side note, I absolutely love the stampede. I feel like I was meant to be a cowboy. I’ve been listening to country music all week. ok, back to the blog). I had an absolutely amazing time at the Stampede. There were games and attractions and the coolest Grandstand show ever. There was tons of sweets and goodies, country music, live entertainment. There was everything imaginable to be distracted and entertained. I have to say, though, while I was at the Stampede it didn’t even occur to me to be using my gifts for God right then and there. It wasn’t even that this was the last thought on my mind. It wasn’t even a thought in my mind to begin with. I was much more focused on getting my beef on a bun and seeing the chucks than using my gifts for God. Can you relate at all?
Don’t get me wrong; I don’t think there is anything wrong with having a good time. However, I know that everything that I have in this life, everything from my possessions to my gifts to each and every second that I have to live is a gift from God. There is nothing that I have done nor anything that I can do to deserve these gifts. They are from God, and so it is my purpose to give it entirely back to him. Entirely. That doesn’t mean thinking about God most of the time. That doesn’t mean putting in a really good effort to love someone once a week. Entirely means everything. Every last bit of my being and of my time is for God. That is the standard for the members of God’s family. Mostly is not good enough. Almost everything is not good enough. Practically all the time is not good enough. Entirely means everything.
Then he said to them all: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it.”
Luke 9:23-24
I will close off by saying this: I have a friend who texted me today encouraging me in my soon to be position as a youth pastor in Lethbridge. She also asked me if I had any really cool God-encounters lately. Though she may not know it, this was really convicting for me. I have had some really cool God encounters lately, but I had to think for a while of what they might be. I can’t help but think if I am taking Luke 9 seriously, this should be second nature to think of, no effort at all.
I did come to one really cool God experience in my memory after a while of thinking, from the same girl actually. She’s quite sick right now, and taking medicine specifically prescribed from the doctor to cure what should be just a common cold. Even though she is really sick, she took the time to encourage me. She put her gifts to work, even in the most inconvenient circumstances.
Ask yourself with me: how do I do in using my gifts when the circumstances are ideal, let alone inconvenient?
May God bless you as you use your everything entirely.
Perhaps I am writing for one of you reading this. Perhaps I am writing this so that I can learn something through introspection. I honestly do not know yet. What I do know is that I am writing for a purpose, and this purpose, whatever it should be, was already in the mind of God before I started writing. I know that God has purpose for what I write, because it was him who gave me the ability to write in the first place. He gave me the ability to write and he develops my ability as I put it to use. Certainly, my intention in putting my ability in writing, and all my abilities for that matter, to use is to follow God’s leading and bring glory to his name. There is no use in using any of my abilities unless they are used unto God.
It is quite convicting to look back and assess the amount of time I have spent using my abilities for something other than giving them completely back to God. There are so many times that I simply don’t put the abilities God has gifted me with to good use, let alone the times that I completely profane my gifts whenever I am led away into sin. What God has gifted me with is meant to be entirely and immensely focused on him. God has gifted me with abilities, not so that I could spend them on myself, but so that I could spend them on his kingdom. Yet, there are so many times when I am not even aware of how I am using my gifts for God. There are countless occasions in my experience where using my gifts for God are not even a thought in my mind.
Take for example my trip to the Calgary Stampede on Sunday (ok, side note, I absolutely love the stampede. I feel like I was meant to be a cowboy. I’ve been listening to country music all week. ok, back to the blog). I had an absolutely amazing time at the Stampede. There were games and attractions and the coolest Grandstand show ever. There was tons of sweets and goodies, country music, live entertainment. There was everything imaginable to be distracted and entertained. I have to say, though, while I was at the Stampede it didn’t even occur to me to be using my gifts for God right then and there. It wasn’t even that this was the last thought on my mind. It wasn’t even a thought in my mind to begin with. I was much more focused on getting my beef on a bun and seeing the chucks than using my gifts for God. Can you relate at all?
Don’t get me wrong; I don’t think there is anything wrong with having a good time. However, I know that everything that I have in this life, everything from my possessions to my gifts to each and every second that I have to live is a gift from God. There is nothing that I have done nor anything that I can do to deserve these gifts. They are from God, and so it is my purpose to give it entirely back to him. Entirely. That doesn’t mean thinking about God most of the time. That doesn’t mean putting in a really good effort to love someone once a week. Entirely means everything. Every last bit of my being and of my time is for God. That is the standard for the members of God’s family. Mostly is not good enough. Almost everything is not good enough. Practically all the time is not good enough. Entirely means everything.
Then he said to them all: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it.”
Luke 9:23-24
I will close off by saying this: I have a friend who texted me today encouraging me in my soon to be position as a youth pastor in Lethbridge. She also asked me if I had any really cool God-encounters lately. Though she may not know it, this was really convicting for me. I have had some really cool God encounters lately, but I had to think for a while of what they might be. I can’t help but think if I am taking Luke 9 seriously, this should be second nature to think of, no effort at all.
I did come to one really cool God experience in my memory after a while of thinking, from the same girl actually. She’s quite sick right now, and taking medicine specifically prescribed from the doctor to cure what should be just a common cold. Even though she is really sick, she took the time to encourage me. She put her gifts to work, even in the most inconvenient circumstances.
Ask yourself with me: how do I do in using my gifts when the circumstances are ideal, let alone inconvenient?
May God bless you as you use your everything entirely.
13.7.10
Scatter and Preach
For anyone who reads this, you may or may not know but I have started a new job just recently. So recently that I am just in my second week of work. The first week was anything but smooth. It has been very difficult to get a hold of people and to understand what is going on. Everyone is either busy with camps or vbs' or gone on vacation. This has made it very difficult to get a level of understanding that I would like to help drive this youth ministry into the fall running. I don't even know what a typical 'youth night' looks like at my new church. All of this brought me to reading about Paul or rather Saul and his beginning of his ministry. Before I got to Saul becoming Paul I was reading this morning about how Saul had been persecuting the Church. Saul was throwing people in jail and was a part of the stoning of Stephen. Just after that, it reads that the Church had been scattered all over Judea and Samaria. What comes next completely blew me away (maybe it is basic for everyone else but for me right now, its crazy).
"those who had been scattered went about preaching the word". This is phrase that is crazy. Because it just moves on to tell a story about Philip and his preaching. But what is crazy about the above phrase is how it seems natural that whenever people get scattered they just set up camp somewhere else and continue to preach the word. For the author here it just makes sense that people would be continuing to preach. There is no break for them, it just continues. This made me think so much about my new job and what not in life. I haven't been scattered but i have moved. For Philip, he just moved on to Samaria and continued to do what he did, it didn't matter where he was. This made me wonder about my job. Do I just do what I do, and it doesn't really matter all that much about where I am? What about the culture and being relevant to the community I am in? It seems like it would be a pretty big deal to move from one place and start up another ministry somewhere else. We tend to make a big deal about culture and that different places involve different methods. But maybe we should just be focused on doing what we do, preaching and spreading the word.
"those who had been scattered went about preaching the word". This is phrase that is crazy. Because it just moves on to tell a story about Philip and his preaching. But what is crazy about the above phrase is how it seems natural that whenever people get scattered they just set up camp somewhere else and continue to preach the word. For the author here it just makes sense that people would be continuing to preach. There is no break for them, it just continues. This made me think so much about my new job and what not in life. I haven't been scattered but i have moved. For Philip, he just moved on to Samaria and continued to do what he did, it didn't matter where he was. This made me wonder about my job. Do I just do what I do, and it doesn't really matter all that much about where I am? What about the culture and being relevant to the community I am in? It seems like it would be a pretty big deal to move from one place and start up another ministry somewhere else. We tend to make a big deal about culture and that different places involve different methods. But maybe we should just be focused on doing what we do, preaching and spreading the word.
9.6.10
A Test, Who's Watching?
Have you every had a really ordinary experience turn extraordinary all at once? You’re in your favorite spot doing your regular gig, and then all of a sudden what was once commonplace now turns completely surreal. Everything changes. Something has interrupted your groove and perhaps intervened for some purpose. Something, be that a person, a sound, a commotion, a conversation, or a timely word, has altered what may have been an unrecognized passing moment.
I had one such experience, last week, actually. I was in my favorite writing spot in NW Calgary, which for many of you who know me well can probably guess as the Starbucks in Crowfoot. I grabbed my quasi-usual armchair beside the couch and coffee table, ordered my tall-bold-no-room coffee, leaned back in pure satisfaction after my first sip, and began writing in my coil notebook. Such was the routine I was accustomed to at this Starbucks. Nothing out of the ordinary, simply complete bliss and relaxation; the perfect atmosphere to engage in writing. I wrote about 3 pages until my first pleasant surprise came along.
It came with a familiar voice that I’ve grown to love dearly and followed by a surprised laugh that I could pinpoint in any crowd. I looked up already expecting to see my mom and dad ordering their coffee at the till. They had been out running some errands and came to the Starbucks with no presumption I would be sitting in their writing. They sat on the couch beside my armchair and we talked about the day, about the weekend and about my future as a pastor. I shared some of my anxieties and concerns about my job placement, not least of which was my faith in God’s direction. Little did I know in that commonplace moment my faith would be tested not two hours later in that exact same spot. My parents finished the last few sips of their coffee and made it on their way again. I stayed behind to continue writing. I felt as though I was on a roll and was compelled to continue until I couldn’t write any more.
I was intently writing on loving God and refusing to make excuses that lead toward mediocrity. Having written the developing thoughts of my argument I started to passionately drive home my point. As I began this literary journey, my excursion was interrupted abruptly. At first I thought the interruption originated from the two overly-dramatic girls who couldn’t decide whether they wanted to sit on the couch beside me or on the stools. With a few whispers and laughs they opted for the stools and I dismissed the interruption as an inconvenient distraction. The interruption came again, this time more poignantly than before. I put down my pen, gently closed my notebook and listened. Without a doubt I heard something. It was not auditory, yet undeniably vocal. The calling that was neither human nor earthly simultaneously gripped my heart and mind. The instruction was clear: “In a moment someone will sit beside you on the couch. They will ask you what you are writing. You must tell them.”
At first I was paralyzed with fear at encounter and the possibility that it could be supernatural prophecy. A moment later I tried everything I could to dismiss the instruction as my mind playing tricks on me. I grabbed my pen, opened my notebook and began to write frantically in attempts to distract myself. The recollection of the encounter never quite left. Deep in my being I knew the instruction would come to pass. It was simply a matter of time and my willingness.
Strangely enough, the two whimsical girls came back to sit on the couch, but not quite beside me. They sat at the opposite end, continuing in their female gabble and giggles. I half expected one of them to ask what I was writing, but when they got up and returned to their car a strange and fleeting sense of failure brushed my mind. Was I supposed to begin a conversation with these two that would lead them to ask what I was writing? Was I paralyzed by my own lack of faith to pursue what was right? Though the thought was present, I was able to easily dismiss it. I felt a sense of peace even in dismissing the sense of failure, trusting that if the aforementioned instruction were indeed supernatural guidance, the experience to come would be undeniable. All the same, I still dreaded sharing my faith with a stranger.
It wasn’t five minutes after the last guests on the couch beside me dismissed themselves that another group of college students came to the till beside me to order their coffees. It was a group of four of them, this time, one of whom was impossible to miss. They say there are two kinds of people in this world: those who are introverts and those who are extroverts, but I would have to say the guy that just came in, the one who was impossible to miss, he was in a category all on his own. I am an extrovert. Compared to this guy, I seem like the shyest person you will ever meet. I don’t think there was one word this guy said that anyone in the Starbucks missed. For that matter, I don’t think there was one thought this guy had that wasn’t made explicitly auditory. He was certainly the strongest personality in his group of friends, and he engaged each of them, along with half the people in the Starbucks, as he vibrantly recounted the events of the last week. Mind you, it was not so much the captivating nature of the stories that compelled the attention of so many, but more so the sheer volume and presence of his personality. I looked up from my notebook to catch a glance of this character. I quickly noticed that I was not the only one spotting this individual. Having seen all I needed, I bowed my head and said a gentle prayer somewhat to the effect of, “Dear God, thank you so much for this guy at the till and his vibrant personality. Please help him to sit anywhere but on this couch next to me. Amen.” That was mistake number one. I don’t know what it is with God and answering these kinds of prayers, maybe it’s his sense of humor, but for whatever reason things seem to happen in the exact opposite way you want them to every time. “Hey man! Can we sit on this couch thingy beside you?” he nodded toward the couch and began to sit down before I answered. “Absolutely! Please, be my guest!” If my prayer was mistake number one then this response was mistake number two. Absolutely? Be my guest? I was making it sound like I wanted him to sit down. Immediately after I gave this invitation, pen and notebook in hand, I knew without a shadow of a doubt what the next question would be.
When you expect that a certain event that will take you out of your comfort zone may occur, you become anxious. When you realize there is no chance whatsoever in avoiding such an event, you become terrified. I was terrified. It wouldn’t be so bad if I knew that I could kind of enter into a surface level conversation, barely, but I knew with this guy there was no possibility of that.
The question came without any form of disguise whatsoever. “What are you writing?” he asked. When the instruction I heard earlier told me someone would ask me what I was writing, I didn’t think the instruction was that literal. I paused for what seemed to be an eternity. “Uh, well, haha,” I think were the first profound words that came out of my mouth. I considered for a split second to lie or to tell about something else I had written. A second later, though, I knew what I needed to say, “I’m actually writing a book about life and my thoughts on God.”
“Oh, so you believe in God?”
“Yes, I do”
“Oh, so you believe there is a heaven and a hell then?”
“Yes, I do”
Without the slightest hesitation, this guy began to tell me his opinion of heaven and hell as if I had asked him for it. “yeah, I believe in heaven and hell to, but like, I believe that earth is hell. I believe that heaven is where you go when you escape hell, so like, I believe in reincarnation. Do you believe in reincarnation? Do you believe that it’s possible?”
I wanted to be as respectful as possible without compromising my convictions, “well, um, no, not really, no, I don’t believe that.”
“So do you believe God is a man?”
“Well, I believe in Jesus, Yes.”
What came next surprised me. This guy obviously knew about Christianity and had chosen not to believe in it, “Oh, so you believe that God came to earth and he died on a cross to save the world and forgive sin and all that?”
“Yep, I guess, that sounds about right”
“I don’t believe in that. So do you think of God as a big man with long grey hair?”
I could tell he was partly mocking me, yet not without an appreciation for my opposing views. The conversation ended shortly after this question as this guy and his friends lost interest in the topic and conversation. I should say that while the guy bombarding me with questions was obviously not uncomfortable about pursuing the theological discussion, his friends more than obviously were. The entire time each of them were curled up like worms being scorched on hot pavement. They looked at the floor nearly the entire time as though I was going to start biting their heads off. It was ironically comical.
About ten minutes later the group of friends made it on their way. The guy bid me farewell and good luck on my book, a little tongue-in-cheek, but sincere nonetheless. I sat there on the armchair, dumbfounded to say the least. I shook my head and laughed quietly to myself. I had to take a moment to process everything that had just happened. It seemed like a really weird dream or something that you would read about. I guess I never thought I’d be the one writing the story. I finished my journal entry in my coil notebook, imagining what sort of influence my testimony may have had. What was its purpose? Why did God bring that exact person to me at that exact moment? Was it some sort of test?
The timing of events to my thoughts was beginning to seem a little beyond coincidental. During this entire experience at Starbucks I would be processing a thought and then immediately the answer would come. This last thought was no exception. Right as I was processing the purpose of the encounter, I was interrupted one last time. This time when I looked up I saw an old friendly face I had never seen before. It was a strong but older man, probably edging his late 60’s. With grey hair and glasses he looked at me and smiled and said, “I heard what you said to those people sitting over there. Way to go! Keep up the good work!” he gave me a thumbs-up, smiled once again, and turned to leave. I expressed my thanks for his encouragement, and I was encouraged. I was very encouraged. I guess I passed the test.
I forgot to mention something about this last stranger. I never did see him come in to the Starbucks. I distinctly remember looking over my shoulder before the group of people came in and the man wasn’t behind me. Of course, the man could have been hidden behind some ornament or poster board, but what happened next was even more astonishing. I looked down at my notebook briefly after the man turned to leave and I looked up again and the man was gone. I don’t really even know if anyone but me knew he was there. Perhaps it was a mysterious encounter with a kind individual who was prompted by God to encourage me. Perhaps it was something else.
You never know who may be watching, listening and observing your testimony; perhaps a guy who needs to be put back on track, perhaps a bystander who will be encouraged by your conviction, or perhaps, perhaps God will be listening in on your conversation with one of his very own messengers…
You never know when God will test you. You never know when your testimony will make an eternal difference. If you were in my shoes tomorrow, would you pass the test?
I had one such experience, last week, actually. I was in my favorite writing spot in NW Calgary, which for many of you who know me well can probably guess as the Starbucks in Crowfoot. I grabbed my quasi-usual armchair beside the couch and coffee table, ordered my tall-bold-no-room coffee, leaned back in pure satisfaction after my first sip, and began writing in my coil notebook. Such was the routine I was accustomed to at this Starbucks. Nothing out of the ordinary, simply complete bliss and relaxation; the perfect atmosphere to engage in writing. I wrote about 3 pages until my first pleasant surprise came along.
It came with a familiar voice that I’ve grown to love dearly and followed by a surprised laugh that I could pinpoint in any crowd. I looked up already expecting to see my mom and dad ordering their coffee at the till. They had been out running some errands and came to the Starbucks with no presumption I would be sitting in their writing. They sat on the couch beside my armchair and we talked about the day, about the weekend and about my future as a pastor. I shared some of my anxieties and concerns about my job placement, not least of which was my faith in God’s direction. Little did I know in that commonplace moment my faith would be tested not two hours later in that exact same spot. My parents finished the last few sips of their coffee and made it on their way again. I stayed behind to continue writing. I felt as though I was on a roll and was compelled to continue until I couldn’t write any more.
I was intently writing on loving God and refusing to make excuses that lead toward mediocrity. Having written the developing thoughts of my argument I started to passionately drive home my point. As I began this literary journey, my excursion was interrupted abruptly. At first I thought the interruption originated from the two overly-dramatic girls who couldn’t decide whether they wanted to sit on the couch beside me or on the stools. With a few whispers and laughs they opted for the stools and I dismissed the interruption as an inconvenient distraction. The interruption came again, this time more poignantly than before. I put down my pen, gently closed my notebook and listened. Without a doubt I heard something. It was not auditory, yet undeniably vocal. The calling that was neither human nor earthly simultaneously gripped my heart and mind. The instruction was clear: “In a moment someone will sit beside you on the couch. They will ask you what you are writing. You must tell them.”
At first I was paralyzed with fear at encounter and the possibility that it could be supernatural prophecy. A moment later I tried everything I could to dismiss the instruction as my mind playing tricks on me. I grabbed my pen, opened my notebook and began to write frantically in attempts to distract myself. The recollection of the encounter never quite left. Deep in my being I knew the instruction would come to pass. It was simply a matter of time and my willingness.
Strangely enough, the two whimsical girls came back to sit on the couch, but not quite beside me. They sat at the opposite end, continuing in their female gabble and giggles. I half expected one of them to ask what I was writing, but when they got up and returned to their car a strange and fleeting sense of failure brushed my mind. Was I supposed to begin a conversation with these two that would lead them to ask what I was writing? Was I paralyzed by my own lack of faith to pursue what was right? Though the thought was present, I was able to easily dismiss it. I felt a sense of peace even in dismissing the sense of failure, trusting that if the aforementioned instruction were indeed supernatural guidance, the experience to come would be undeniable. All the same, I still dreaded sharing my faith with a stranger.
It wasn’t five minutes after the last guests on the couch beside me dismissed themselves that another group of college students came to the till beside me to order their coffees. It was a group of four of them, this time, one of whom was impossible to miss. They say there are two kinds of people in this world: those who are introverts and those who are extroverts, but I would have to say the guy that just came in, the one who was impossible to miss, he was in a category all on his own. I am an extrovert. Compared to this guy, I seem like the shyest person you will ever meet. I don’t think there was one word this guy said that anyone in the Starbucks missed. For that matter, I don’t think there was one thought this guy had that wasn’t made explicitly auditory. He was certainly the strongest personality in his group of friends, and he engaged each of them, along with half the people in the Starbucks, as he vibrantly recounted the events of the last week. Mind you, it was not so much the captivating nature of the stories that compelled the attention of so many, but more so the sheer volume and presence of his personality. I looked up from my notebook to catch a glance of this character. I quickly noticed that I was not the only one spotting this individual. Having seen all I needed, I bowed my head and said a gentle prayer somewhat to the effect of, “Dear God, thank you so much for this guy at the till and his vibrant personality. Please help him to sit anywhere but on this couch next to me. Amen.” That was mistake number one. I don’t know what it is with God and answering these kinds of prayers, maybe it’s his sense of humor, but for whatever reason things seem to happen in the exact opposite way you want them to every time. “Hey man! Can we sit on this couch thingy beside you?” he nodded toward the couch and began to sit down before I answered. “Absolutely! Please, be my guest!” If my prayer was mistake number one then this response was mistake number two. Absolutely? Be my guest? I was making it sound like I wanted him to sit down. Immediately after I gave this invitation, pen and notebook in hand, I knew without a shadow of a doubt what the next question would be.
When you expect that a certain event that will take you out of your comfort zone may occur, you become anxious. When you realize there is no chance whatsoever in avoiding such an event, you become terrified. I was terrified. It wouldn’t be so bad if I knew that I could kind of enter into a surface level conversation, barely, but I knew with this guy there was no possibility of that.
The question came without any form of disguise whatsoever. “What are you writing?” he asked. When the instruction I heard earlier told me someone would ask me what I was writing, I didn’t think the instruction was that literal. I paused for what seemed to be an eternity. “Uh, well, haha,” I think were the first profound words that came out of my mouth. I considered for a split second to lie or to tell about something else I had written. A second later, though, I knew what I needed to say, “I’m actually writing a book about life and my thoughts on God.”
“Oh, so you believe in God?”
“Yes, I do”
“Oh, so you believe there is a heaven and a hell then?”
“Yes, I do”
Without the slightest hesitation, this guy began to tell me his opinion of heaven and hell as if I had asked him for it. “yeah, I believe in heaven and hell to, but like, I believe that earth is hell. I believe that heaven is where you go when you escape hell, so like, I believe in reincarnation. Do you believe in reincarnation? Do you believe that it’s possible?”
I wanted to be as respectful as possible without compromising my convictions, “well, um, no, not really, no, I don’t believe that.”
“So do you believe God is a man?”
“Well, I believe in Jesus, Yes.”
What came next surprised me. This guy obviously knew about Christianity and had chosen not to believe in it, “Oh, so you believe that God came to earth and he died on a cross to save the world and forgive sin and all that?”
“Yep, I guess, that sounds about right”
“I don’t believe in that. So do you think of God as a big man with long grey hair?”
I could tell he was partly mocking me, yet not without an appreciation for my opposing views. The conversation ended shortly after this question as this guy and his friends lost interest in the topic and conversation. I should say that while the guy bombarding me with questions was obviously not uncomfortable about pursuing the theological discussion, his friends more than obviously were. The entire time each of them were curled up like worms being scorched on hot pavement. They looked at the floor nearly the entire time as though I was going to start biting their heads off. It was ironically comical.
About ten minutes later the group of friends made it on their way. The guy bid me farewell and good luck on my book, a little tongue-in-cheek, but sincere nonetheless. I sat there on the armchair, dumbfounded to say the least. I shook my head and laughed quietly to myself. I had to take a moment to process everything that had just happened. It seemed like a really weird dream or something that you would read about. I guess I never thought I’d be the one writing the story. I finished my journal entry in my coil notebook, imagining what sort of influence my testimony may have had. What was its purpose? Why did God bring that exact person to me at that exact moment? Was it some sort of test?
The timing of events to my thoughts was beginning to seem a little beyond coincidental. During this entire experience at Starbucks I would be processing a thought and then immediately the answer would come. This last thought was no exception. Right as I was processing the purpose of the encounter, I was interrupted one last time. This time when I looked up I saw an old friendly face I had never seen before. It was a strong but older man, probably edging his late 60’s. With grey hair and glasses he looked at me and smiled and said, “I heard what you said to those people sitting over there. Way to go! Keep up the good work!” he gave me a thumbs-up, smiled once again, and turned to leave. I expressed my thanks for his encouragement, and I was encouraged. I was very encouraged. I guess I passed the test.
I forgot to mention something about this last stranger. I never did see him come in to the Starbucks. I distinctly remember looking over my shoulder before the group of people came in and the man wasn’t behind me. Of course, the man could have been hidden behind some ornament or poster board, but what happened next was even more astonishing. I looked down at my notebook briefly after the man turned to leave and I looked up again and the man was gone. I don’t really even know if anyone but me knew he was there. Perhaps it was a mysterious encounter with a kind individual who was prompted by God to encourage me. Perhaps it was something else.
You never know who may be watching, listening and observing your testimony; perhaps a guy who needs to be put back on track, perhaps a bystander who will be encouraged by your conviction, or perhaps, perhaps God will be listening in on your conversation with one of his very own messengers…
You never know when God will test you. You never know when your testimony will make an eternal difference. If you were in my shoes tomorrow, would you pass the test?
29.4.10
A Convenient Sickness?
Have you ever had something really unpleasant happen to you at an ironically convenient time? I mean, when you really think about it, has there ever been a time where you were even a little bit thankful for an unpleasant event, or maybe at least thankful that it didn’t happen at a different time?
It’s hard to think of a time like that, isn’t it? We’re really good at remembering the horrible timing of foul events in our lives. We may actually enjoy it; complaining about our dreadful circumstances to gain the attention and sympathy of others. Yet, when it comes to finding bits of joy in our hurts, we’re much less capable. Actually, capable might not be the right word. Perhaps “willing” would be a better fit. We don’t like to find joy in our hurts because it is hard; we want our hurt to go away, not to think about how it might be a blessing. We blind ourselves from the potential blessing of our circumstances with the discomfort of our present. We are so easily narrow-focused.
It was easy for me to be narrow-focused today. I helped my friend Joel move yesterday and almost as soon as I got home I burned up with a fever and almost every muscle in my body ached. I tried to sleep but the fever made my head spin at a million miles an hour. I did get some sleep, but when I woke up, I still felt awful. Actually, as I am writing this blog I still don’t feel that great (Although, the fever is gone and my body doesn’t hurt as bad). I felt sick all day. I wanted so bad for the day just to be over and for the sickness to go away. Oh, by the way, for those of you who don’t know Joel is the other member of this blogspot. Actually, I haven’t told him I am sick yet. Joel, if you are reading this, you should take some cold FX so you don’t get sick too :P. Ok, back to the blog. When I woke up this morning, I realized how much this sickness was going to ruin my day. I had a whole bunch of work I wanted to get done at the church, people I wanted to get together with, and little errands I wanted to get done. None of these were so much as attempted, let alone accomplished. However, when I looked outside my window, my perspective changed a little.
You know how when you wake up in the morning there’s a certain kind of light you’re expecting to be coming through your window? You know, the certain tone and colors of the sunrise through the drapes of your bedroom window that change every season? Well, being as it’s April right now, I was expecting to wake up to the nice warm oranges and reds of a spring sunrise. Instead, I woke up to a violently bright sea of white and grey. It wasn’t because I was sick and now I was hallucinating (although, a part of me kind of wishes I was). It was because during the night we had 20 cm of SNOW! Did I mention that it’s April? Oh, not just April, it’s April 29th… almost MAY! A little late to be having snow don’t you think? But when my eyes finally adjusted to the blinding sunlight reflecting off the dunes of snow on my front yard, I realized how blessed I was with the timing of my sickness. I mean, honestly, could there have been a more convenient time to be sick? There was a ton of snow outside at the end of April which means the roads would be horrific. More than that, the blowing snow would have been like sandpaper against your face, and mixed with the cold and wind chill, would have been a dreadful way to start the day. So here I was sitting in my room staring at the April winter wonderland, and I realized that even if I was not sick, I would be stuck at home all day. So there’s the first part of the blessing.
The second blessing that comes with my sickness is the reality that it didn’t take place at some other significant time, like my grad weekend or during the completion of my final papers. If I had been sick on an occasion like those, I would have been so upset. Thankfully, that was not the case. I was conveniently sick not then, but today.
Finally, my sickness gave me time to think and pray. There is little else you can do when you are sick but to think and pray. You’re likely stuck in bed or on the couch all day. You could watch TV, but it would probably give you a headache before long. So besides sleeping, there’s really not much else to do than to think and to pray. Today I had the opportunity to think and to pray quite a bit (along with sorting some files and pictures on my computer, for which I am also grateful). I had the opportunity to talk with the Creator of all things more than I usually do on a given day. For that I am thankful.
You see, it is so easy to look at what’s wrong in our life. Granted, this fallen world brings a lot of unpleasant and uncomfortable circumstances. However, with an eternal perspective the troubles of our present fade in the light of our connection to Christ. A focus on eternity allows us to see the significance of each moment God has granted to us, and the finitude of our hurts and pains.
When we see God in every moment, we find the fragments of joy in our brokenness.
How has God bless you today?
It’s hard to think of a time like that, isn’t it? We’re really good at remembering the horrible timing of foul events in our lives. We may actually enjoy it; complaining about our dreadful circumstances to gain the attention and sympathy of others. Yet, when it comes to finding bits of joy in our hurts, we’re much less capable. Actually, capable might not be the right word. Perhaps “willing” would be a better fit. We don’t like to find joy in our hurts because it is hard; we want our hurt to go away, not to think about how it might be a blessing. We blind ourselves from the potential blessing of our circumstances with the discomfort of our present. We are so easily narrow-focused.
It was easy for me to be narrow-focused today. I helped my friend Joel move yesterday and almost as soon as I got home I burned up with a fever and almost every muscle in my body ached. I tried to sleep but the fever made my head spin at a million miles an hour. I did get some sleep, but when I woke up, I still felt awful. Actually, as I am writing this blog I still don’t feel that great (Although, the fever is gone and my body doesn’t hurt as bad). I felt sick all day. I wanted so bad for the day just to be over and for the sickness to go away. Oh, by the way, for those of you who don’t know Joel is the other member of this blogspot. Actually, I haven’t told him I am sick yet. Joel, if you are reading this, you should take some cold FX so you don’t get sick too :P. Ok, back to the blog. When I woke up this morning, I realized how much this sickness was going to ruin my day. I had a whole bunch of work I wanted to get done at the church, people I wanted to get together with, and little errands I wanted to get done. None of these were so much as attempted, let alone accomplished. However, when I looked outside my window, my perspective changed a little.
You know how when you wake up in the morning there’s a certain kind of light you’re expecting to be coming through your window? You know, the certain tone and colors of the sunrise through the drapes of your bedroom window that change every season? Well, being as it’s April right now, I was expecting to wake up to the nice warm oranges and reds of a spring sunrise. Instead, I woke up to a violently bright sea of white and grey. It wasn’t because I was sick and now I was hallucinating (although, a part of me kind of wishes I was). It was because during the night we had 20 cm of SNOW! Did I mention that it’s April? Oh, not just April, it’s April 29th… almost MAY! A little late to be having snow don’t you think? But when my eyes finally adjusted to the blinding sunlight reflecting off the dunes of snow on my front yard, I realized how blessed I was with the timing of my sickness. I mean, honestly, could there have been a more convenient time to be sick? There was a ton of snow outside at the end of April which means the roads would be horrific. More than that, the blowing snow would have been like sandpaper against your face, and mixed with the cold and wind chill, would have been a dreadful way to start the day. So here I was sitting in my room staring at the April winter wonderland, and I realized that even if I was not sick, I would be stuck at home all day. So there’s the first part of the blessing.
The second blessing that comes with my sickness is the reality that it didn’t take place at some other significant time, like my grad weekend or during the completion of my final papers. If I had been sick on an occasion like those, I would have been so upset. Thankfully, that was not the case. I was conveniently sick not then, but today.
Finally, my sickness gave me time to think and pray. There is little else you can do when you are sick but to think and pray. You’re likely stuck in bed or on the couch all day. You could watch TV, but it would probably give you a headache before long. So besides sleeping, there’s really not much else to do than to think and to pray. Today I had the opportunity to think and to pray quite a bit (along with sorting some files and pictures on my computer, for which I am also grateful). I had the opportunity to talk with the Creator of all things more than I usually do on a given day. For that I am thankful.
You see, it is so easy to look at what’s wrong in our life. Granted, this fallen world brings a lot of unpleasant and uncomfortable circumstances. However, with an eternal perspective the troubles of our present fade in the light of our connection to Christ. A focus on eternity allows us to see the significance of each moment God has granted to us, and the finitude of our hurts and pains.
When we see God in every moment, we find the fragments of joy in our brokenness.
How has God bless you today?
8.4.10
To know the music
It’s all around us. In front of us. Behind us. In the air. In the ground. Yes, even within our own bodies. Yet, the funny thing is, we so easily miss it. I wonder why that is. Why is it so easy to miss? Some may say it is too quiet, but I don’t think that is the issue. Actually, If I’m going to be honest with you, I think it has much less to do with the volume and much more to do with our listening. In fact, I think that there are times when the volume is piercing and undeniable, and still we will go to the effort of blocking it out and ignoring it all together. And then, when it is quiet or perhaps even silent, we wonder why it isn’t louder instead of leaning in and listening carefully.
We don’t want to hear it until it is convenient. When things are going well, it’s mostly a nuisance. When things are going terrible, it’s never what we want to hear. When we are desperate we listen to everything else. Even when we are at the top of our game, at the peak of the mountain, we still go searching for something else to give us direction. Tell me, does it shock you like it shocks me that when our hopes and dreams come crashing down upon us we don’t know which direction to point our eyes and ears?
We begin listening to everything else, and it consumes us. It consumes us so much that we don’t even recognize the very thing which has always been all around us in every way. We may even fall so deep as to replace what should be heard with something entirely different, thinking the two are the exact same thing. And so I ask again, does it shock you?
It’s easy to miss. But you know, it’s also easy to see if you focus your attention. When you filter your attention on what is good, you will be able to see it; not only in the present, but in a way that you will know it was with you all along.
It’s not always loud. It’s not always audible. I empathize with you if you are in a place where you feel like you can’t hear it. Whether you are there or not, let me encourage you:
The silent symphony of God’s love is love without words, for words aren’t enough.
Eternal life...
... is to know the music
We don’t want to hear it until it is convenient. When things are going well, it’s mostly a nuisance. When things are going terrible, it’s never what we want to hear. When we are desperate we listen to everything else. Even when we are at the top of our game, at the peak of the mountain, we still go searching for something else to give us direction. Tell me, does it shock you like it shocks me that when our hopes and dreams come crashing down upon us we don’t know which direction to point our eyes and ears?
We begin listening to everything else, and it consumes us. It consumes us so much that we don’t even recognize the very thing which has always been all around us in every way. We may even fall so deep as to replace what should be heard with something entirely different, thinking the two are the exact same thing. And so I ask again, does it shock you?
It’s easy to miss. But you know, it’s also easy to see if you focus your attention. When you filter your attention on what is good, you will be able to see it; not only in the present, but in a way that you will know it was with you all along.
It’s not always loud. It’s not always audible. I empathize with you if you are in a place where you feel like you can’t hear it. Whether you are there or not, let me encourage you:
The silent symphony of God’s love is love without words, for words aren’t enough.
Eternal life...
... is to know the music
19.3.10
Read your Bible, Go to Church, and Always Remember to say “Jesus”
Have you ever been stuck inside a bubble? I mean literally, you scrunched inside a 4 foot bubble. I was about 8 when I had my stuck-inside-a-bubble experience. It was at the mall near my house. There was this massive indoor playground with tunnels and jut-outs and ropes and slides and everything an 8-year-old could ever want in a playground. It was a child’s miniature paradise. And when you’re 8 years old, everything seems a thousand times bigger than it actually is. That is how an 8 year old can get completely lost in a playground half the size of a basketball court. It sure doesn’t help when the main focal point of the whole maze of tunnels and tubes is a big clear ball in the center: the bubble. Every single kid made it his or her personal mission to make it to the bubble. I too wanted to get to the bubble, but unlike every other child, I couldn’t find the way. Oh as a sidenote, you’ll probably figure out quite quickly that I am not normal. Ok, continuing. After what seemed to be an eternity (but in actual time, probably only 15 minutes) I stumbled into this strange pathway that I had not been down before. I bent, twisted and jumped through hoops to get through this jungle of plastic and Plexiglas. And all of the work paid off. I was finally there: the bubble.
I was completely overwhelmed with excitement and accomplishment and satisfaction at the fact that I had finally made it into the bubble. For the first five minutes I just sat there in the middle of the bubble in proud victory over the eternal caverns I had overcome. Soon after, some other kids had found their own way into the bubble and we all rejoiced together at our accomplishment. Not too long after this, another group of kids came back to the bubble and attempted to force their way back into the bubble which was once there. In the span of about 2 seconds, all of my feelings of excitement dramatically transformed to panic and desperation. I needed to get out of the bubble. Now.
By this time the bubble was far beyond the limits of human capacity. I wanted desperately to get out of the bubble. To say it was no longer comfortable would be a monstrous understatement. I pushed and fought my way through the bombardment 4-foot’ers and after a little less than forever, I finally made it out of the bubble. I cannot describe to you the sense of disappointment and failure I felt leaving that bubble. I felt excluded, defeated, alone. And I knew the last thing to ever happen would be me getting back into the bubble. There was no chance of that.
And yet I wonder, is my experience as an 8 year old in a massive indoor jungle gym really that different from the churches all around us? If we stop and think about it, does our maturity as members of the body of Christ reflect better on our calling as a human being, or maybe better on that of an immature 8 year old? Or, dare I say, the eight year old could teach us lessons? But even if we were taught by the eight year old child, we wouldn’t listen. We would be too busy in our own bubbles we have created. I mean really, we know everything there is to say and do anyways, right?
Consider with me the foyer of the church. You walk in the doors a few minutes before the service and everyone, absolutely everyone is standing in little pockets of circles. At the drop of a dime they could join hands and start twenty different games of ring-around-the-rosie. But something like that would require effort, and for sure we wouldn’t want that. Who brings effort to church? That’s for after church when you’re making your 12 topping pizza before the big game. No, the circles would continue to be circles and you would only be able to join one if you had made the twists and turns and jumped through hoops to get there. The funny thing is, that’s not even the beginning of the bubble we create. The real trick is understanding the unwritten rules.
Rule number one: Read your bible.
Just read your bible. Open the pages and read words. If you can understand what the words are saying, bonus.
Rule number two: Go to church.
Make sure you come to the main weekend service, and the more you can come during the week, the better.
Rule number three: always remember to say “Jesus”
If there is ever a deep, theological challenge, a main point from the sermon, or basically any question asked in the church, the answer is Jesus. It doesn’t matter what you really think about the issue or question, the answer is Jesus.
Final Rule: We don’t want to offend you.
If anything here or anything said inside the church offends you, feel free to disregard it. We don’t want to offend you.
Of course, I have placed a high level of Sinicism into this thought. I have done this, not to express how I actually feel about the church, but to exaggerate and prove a point. I want us all to understand that the constructs and functions of our churches are not functioning the way they should… and perhaps the trouble we have with our students and congregation giving pat answers to the question, “what is God saying to you” is really a reflection of the “Jesus” bubble we focus all of our attention on creating. And we do such a good job of creating this select, exclusive group that only the qualified few will recognize this Christian bubble as the “Red Letter Bubble”.
Perhaps the red letters of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John are not meant to strengthen the walls of the exclusive, comfortable fellowship of believers, but rather meant to challenge our thoughts, break down our human regulations and heal our paralysis which was brought by self-imposed comfort and complacency. And then, in a very real sense, the red letters which our Savior was dying to say to us might come and bring transforming life renewal.
“For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.”
2 Corinthians 5:14-15
What might be possible if this verse became the defining reality of our lives?
I was completely overwhelmed with excitement and accomplishment and satisfaction at the fact that I had finally made it into the bubble. For the first five minutes I just sat there in the middle of the bubble in proud victory over the eternal caverns I had overcome. Soon after, some other kids had found their own way into the bubble and we all rejoiced together at our accomplishment. Not too long after this, another group of kids came back to the bubble and attempted to force their way back into the bubble which was once there. In the span of about 2 seconds, all of my feelings of excitement dramatically transformed to panic and desperation. I needed to get out of the bubble. Now.
By this time the bubble was far beyond the limits of human capacity. I wanted desperately to get out of the bubble. To say it was no longer comfortable would be a monstrous understatement. I pushed and fought my way through the bombardment 4-foot’ers and after a little less than forever, I finally made it out of the bubble. I cannot describe to you the sense of disappointment and failure I felt leaving that bubble. I felt excluded, defeated, alone. And I knew the last thing to ever happen would be me getting back into the bubble. There was no chance of that.
And yet I wonder, is my experience as an 8 year old in a massive indoor jungle gym really that different from the churches all around us? If we stop and think about it, does our maturity as members of the body of Christ reflect better on our calling as a human being, or maybe better on that of an immature 8 year old? Or, dare I say, the eight year old could teach us lessons? But even if we were taught by the eight year old child, we wouldn’t listen. We would be too busy in our own bubbles we have created. I mean really, we know everything there is to say and do anyways, right?
Consider with me the foyer of the church. You walk in the doors a few minutes before the service and everyone, absolutely everyone is standing in little pockets of circles. At the drop of a dime they could join hands and start twenty different games of ring-around-the-rosie. But something like that would require effort, and for sure we wouldn’t want that. Who brings effort to church? That’s for after church when you’re making your 12 topping pizza before the big game. No, the circles would continue to be circles and you would only be able to join one if you had made the twists and turns and jumped through hoops to get there. The funny thing is, that’s not even the beginning of the bubble we create. The real trick is understanding the unwritten rules.
Rule number one: Read your bible.
Just read your bible. Open the pages and read words. If you can understand what the words are saying, bonus.
Rule number two: Go to church.
Make sure you come to the main weekend service, and the more you can come during the week, the better.
Rule number three: always remember to say “Jesus”
If there is ever a deep, theological challenge, a main point from the sermon, or basically any question asked in the church, the answer is Jesus. It doesn’t matter what you really think about the issue or question, the answer is Jesus.
Final Rule: We don’t want to offend you.
If anything here or anything said inside the church offends you, feel free to disregard it. We don’t want to offend you.
Of course, I have placed a high level of Sinicism into this thought. I have done this, not to express how I actually feel about the church, but to exaggerate and prove a point. I want us all to understand that the constructs and functions of our churches are not functioning the way they should… and perhaps the trouble we have with our students and congregation giving pat answers to the question, “what is God saying to you” is really a reflection of the “Jesus” bubble we focus all of our attention on creating. And we do such a good job of creating this select, exclusive group that only the qualified few will recognize this Christian bubble as the “Red Letter Bubble”.
Perhaps the red letters of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John are not meant to strengthen the walls of the exclusive, comfortable fellowship of believers, but rather meant to challenge our thoughts, break down our human regulations and heal our paralysis which was brought by self-imposed comfort and complacency. And then, in a very real sense, the red letters which our Savior was dying to say to us might come and bring transforming life renewal.
“For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.”
2 Corinthians 5:14-15
What might be possible if this verse became the defining reality of our lives?
15.3.10
The Bitter Sweet Problem
Although I haven't been involved in youth ministry for an extremely long time, there is still one thing that consistently comes up and is becoming to frustrate me more and more. Time and time again when doing a bible study or a talk or anything with some sort of spiritual emphasis, a question will be thrown out there. A question asked to see if the youth are picking up what you are throwing down. The question will often be sound something like this "So, how do you think we can apply what has been talked about in your life?" Maybe it looks like that, maybe the question is phrased a different way, but the person leading the study or doing the talk will say something along those lines to see if the youth are grasping the idea that is being discussed. The person who asks this question seems to almost enjoy punishment, because without a doubt the next few words that come out of the youth's mouths will frustrate and sometimes leave the leader feeling crushed. "Read your Bible", "Pray" and "Go to Church". There you are, the classic Sunday School answers that go right beside "God" and "Jesus". The very words that crush me every time I think I have said something of value. These answers generally come from the students who have been gone to church their entire life and have grown up in a christian house hold. These are the students that have their personal relationship with Christ and you are trying to help them live a life that is fully devoted to Christ.
The frustration comes because these students, who are generally Christian's, are generally the most frustrating to work with. There are ones who don't have a Christian background but they are the ones who are asking the questions but also trying to find the answers. They are not comfortable with where they are in life and are trying to figure it out. On the other hand, there is a usually a group of youth that are comfortable with where they are and don't want to be moved from their state of content, this is the frustrating group. What's frustrating is that they are right and they know it. Reading your Bible, praying and going to church are going to generally help with spiritual things. Everything within me wants to tell them they are wrong because you know full well that they are not getting the point, they are just saying it because it's right. And sometimes it doesn't even matter what the answer is, or whether they have even thought about it, they figure they don't have to think anymore cause they have figured out how to stay content. A question I always find myself wanting to ask these youth when those phrases make their inevitable appearance is "when was the last time you actually read your Bible then" or "when was the last time you actually prayed?" Pray is an answer that is tossed out there for a lot of questions but when it comes to a time when you actually want someone to pray, everyone in the room is pretty quick to not make eye contact and try and look invisible. These are not problems that are in just one specific group, I have been involved in a few groups and have experienced this in all of them.
So how do I help move these students away from their comfortable lives of content? How do you get them to actually live the very applications that they consistently say they should be living. Apparently I enjoy the pain and frustration of it, because this is one of the things that drives me to continue working with them, trying to help transform my life and theirs. It is in fact the bitter sweet problem to have. How do I help bring the Word of God alive to them. Another reason why I care so much about this, is because I used to be one of the youth 6 or so years ago. I used to be content in my faith and not really care to move out of that state. It has only been within the last few years that I really started to understand why we do these things like reading our Bible, praying and going to church. It has only been recently that verses such as Jeremiah 31:33 or Colossians 1:27 (shocking I use those two verses, eh?) have revolutionized my world. So my question: How do I do ministry because off this? On one hand it is great to see youth coming up from the church and being solid in their faith, but on the other hand too often I see the same kids staying content in it.
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